Life is a funny thing. What you think is so important one day turns out to not be so important the next. Then some things tend to come and go in waves. Priorities change and that is okay as long as you keep striving for what makes you happy right?
Let me take you back about two years. I was a horse nut! I spent every waking moment that I wasn't at work, at the barn and the only reason I went to work was to pay for my horse addiction. Linkin and I were doing great and we were working hard towards the move up to Novice at the recognized level. I had a plan in place to get me qualified to do the long format in 2014. Well needless to say, that plan changed quickly when one January evening I went on a first date with Mr. Right. Bryce supported my ambition and wanted to make sure I met my goals. He came with me to several of the events and was extremely supportive. Slowly but surely my focus began to change from the horse crazy girl to the girl falling in love with a boy. With my focus changing, my time schedule also changed. I began spending less time at the barn and more time going on dates. I was still riding fairly consistently, but the competing began to fall by the wayside. I found that my rides were more for the exercise rather than the drive of improving.
That August my focus changed even more when I was proposed to by the man of my dreams. The dirty boots and breeches began to become even less important as I focused on the wedding cake, caterer, and wedding dress. Up until the actual wedding, I knew that riding would take a backseat which meant I was no longer aiming for the long format or even showing at all. Linkin even decided to need a few vet visits during that time which of course sucked up any remaining funds that I would have had for showing.
So here we are, two months after the wedding and I have my eye set on a combined test this weekend. I have gotten back to fairly regular lessons with a dressage trainer, and even managed a few jump lessons. Through the past two years I have consistently been riding, but I am finally feeling that drive again. The drive to get better and see where I need to improve. The drive that would send me over fences that I haven't jumped in over a year. My eye for a fence is one of those things I have found that if I don't use it, I lose it. During the past year I have jumped maybe 2'9" at the tallest and that doesn't keep my eye in gear for the 2'11" Novice course that is in my upcoming future. I know three inches doesn't seem like a lot, but when you are pointing your horse at it and feel that extra surge that he gives you as he locks onto the fence, you know there is a difference.
I am blessed to have Linkin as my horse. We are probably the perfect match for each other. I knew I needed to get over a few bigger fences last night during my ride so I started with setting up several 3' verticals and one 3'3" oxer. The ride started out a little crazy. Linkin has been known to be crazy on several occasions, but this time he thought that one of the barn cats was going to jump out of the woods and eat him alive. If you know the cat, it is probably a valid fear. We spent the first ten minutes just trying to get by that side of the ring without a shoot sideways/ plant and stare. Once we started popping over a few fences, Linkin put his game face on. He was still aware of the cat, but he knew I needed his focus. We soared over the 3' fairly easily as long as I didn't get in his way and headed for the line that included the 3'3" oxer. You always school higher than you will be showing so I felt the need to get over it at least once. Linkin locked on like I knew he would, I added my supportive lower leg and let him build up to the fence like he likes to. We soared over and I knew I had to have the biggest grin on my face. Pure adrenaline was surging through my veins and Linkin could tell he did exactly as I wanted.
Of course we had done that height before in the past, but that doesn't seem to matter when it has been over a year. I have found that I am no longer invincible. I can break, and I definitely don't want to. I also have more to come home to at the end of the day and it is no longer just me that I am living for. Bryce is as supportive and understanding as possible of my drive and fear, but if something happens to me I know it is not just me who pays the price.
Linkin gives me wings, and Bryce makes sure my feet find the ground again afterwards. Right now it is a happy balance between the two most important men in my life, and that is the way I like it!
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